i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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