Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
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