So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
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he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
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I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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