Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize