It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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