Kiss
Puke
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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