Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize