Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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