What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
