I never want to see another naked old woman again.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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