He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
