I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
