If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
