well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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