In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
