when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
