when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
All I want is dick and wine.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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