I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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