around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I lost the right to judge tonight
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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