oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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