fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
