it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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