I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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