what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
