member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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