what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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