Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize