even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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