I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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