I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
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aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
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I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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