My room smells like vodka and shame
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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