Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
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and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
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I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
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