You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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