"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
COCAINE IS GR8
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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