everyone is single if you try hard enough
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
