Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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