The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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