Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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