I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I got her a Nickelback box set.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
