Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
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