I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize