Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
