The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
