I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
