i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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