Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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