I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
