Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
