just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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