He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize