I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I have already put on my inside pants.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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